Looking past harsh judgment
Why is it people always have to have the answers? It’s hard for me to completely surrender my life to Christ and live His way, but maybe this is because I’m faced with challenges from an imperfect world and imperfect people? I’m constantly reminding myself it is short term pain for long term gain. I have many uncertainties, but with every decision I decide to trust God with all of my heart and be obedient. In other words you have to risk it all to pursue what Jesus is calling you to do. It is hard living out this principle in the world we live in today. It is hard to be different in this world and society, but with the help of my Father and my eye on the ultimate prize, I know all the pain will be worth it!
When I became a follower of Christ I decided to put Him at my focus point and live my life according to His sovereign will. People know I am a Christian, and I will openly tell you my story and how God completely turned my life around. But lately, with my life taking another turn and the Lord preparing me for this next season, I was left with quick judgement and harsh comments from others.
It wasn’t uncommon to hear the words, “Wow you’re young to be getting married” “Oh wow you guys haven’t dated that long” “How will you guys make it?” “Are you going to continue to go to school? You have to get a degree so you can make money” “Where are you going to live?” or my favorite, “What do you know about getting married you don’t even have a real job.” It was the constant question of when are you doing this and when are you going to do that and how are you going to do it? Look the answer is simple, I have no idea but my God does and He will direct our every move and He will not leave us stranded for we are actively running towards Him and seeking His will.
I am just trying to be obedient and follow Jesus, which is a lot harder for me to do than some may assume. I am a people pleaser and a planner. When I have to lay my plans aside to pursue what Jesus is calling me to do it is scary because I want to know what will happen, but it doesn’t work like that! You can’t have it both ways. You are either a Christ follower or you’re not. There is no in-between. I know people talk and say hurtful things. We are human it’s not a shocker to me because I’ve cast judgment before too. Maybe you’ve been the person to say I can’t believe Lily is getting married. She is way too young or this is too fast, and if you didn’t say it chances are you probably thought it. I’m okay with that. It was hard for me to swallow at first too.
Like I’ve said, in my relationship with God, He reassures me He will never leave me nor forsake me (Hebrews 13:5). For someone who is a people pleaser, yeah it hurts when people don’t get it or congratulate you and then talk about it behind your back and question your way of living. People may question what I do and why I do it. People may not understand my way of living and bash it. But if people didn’t talk about it would I really be a Christ follower? You see I took that job description when I signed up to be a follower of Jesus. I was completely made new. The way I see is different. The way I feel is different. The way I interpret things is different. The way I hear is different and my heart and purpose is different.
I knew people would question, judge and reject me. All of it is motivation for me not to prove people wrong, but to prove my God right. To prove to everyone that I know my God’s voice. To prove God’s plan is more than enough for me. To prove that my God can take anything and make it beautiful because that is what he did for me. He took me, who was so filthy and covered in shame and polished me in love and grace to make me His. My God has a plan for me and my life. It is not at all how I imagined it, but it is far better than my human desires could ever long for. So I’m in the waiting room right now with school, job, future, and church. I don’t get what He is doing all the time, but I will one day. So in the meantime I’ll sit here patiently and continue to look past judgment and focus on the one who matters most, my savior!
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